What is friendship?
I’m not sure some people know the answer to this question. They can say they know the meaning of friendship, but do they really? I believe the answer is no.
First, I’ll show you the dictionary definition of friendship and then I’ll explain it to you in my own words, from my perspective if you will.
the state of being friends : the relationship between friends
1.
the state of being a friend; association as friends:
to value a person’s friendship.
2.
a friendly relation or intimacy.
3.
friendly feeling or disposition.
These are very simple definitions and don’t really give the true meaning of friendship. Maybe I’m confusing this with what is a true friend. From my perspective this is what I think friendship is…
Friendship is helping one another when one is in need. This doesn’t mean take advantage of your friend but if he/she is in need of something then you help them as best as you are able, this of course goes both ways.
Friendship is acceptance. It’s being able to see each other’s differences and you accept them for who and what they are or believe in.
Friendship is giving support to one another. No matter what your friend is going through you can support them. It doesn’t matter if you approve or not, it’s not for you to judge what they are doing.
This leads me to friendship is never judging each other. Again this does not mean you have to approve but do not judge them, this isn’t your job.
Friendship is working out your differences instead of walking away because you disagree. I’m not saying that you are always going to agree on things and that an arguement won’t occur ever but talking things out and being able to say I was wrong if you in fact were helps the friendship stay good. This doesn’t mean admitting you were wrong if you were right but gently explaining your reasoning helps.
Friendship is apologizing when you know that you have hurt one another. If you have done something to offend or make your friend feel bad give an apology and don’t do the same thing twice, there is a point where I’m sorry begins to lose it’s meaning.
friendship is forgiveness. After the tears and arguements and the I’m sorries, forgive. This goes along with the above statement.
Friendship is love. There are different types of love and letting your friend know how much they mean to you and letting them know that you love them because they are your friend.
Friendship is honesty. Being honest with your friends is very important, sometimes it may hurt but in the long run your friends will respect you more if you tell them the truth. Also don’t lie to others about a friend to make yourself look good. If you and a friend are in a disagreement, don’t go to another friend and make up things about the disagreement that didn’t happen, it does get back to the other people.
Friendship is loyalty. Be true to your friends. If you hear others speaking poorly of a friend, it is ok to step up and say hey, don’t say this about my friend. Don’t join in the backstabbing session.
Friendship is listening to each other. If a friend has a problem, be there for them. If you are truly unable to talk when a friend comes to you, just say hey I’m sorry but I can’t talk right now, can I call you later? Sometimes the friend will get upset over that but there are times you can’t just drop what you are doing to talk. It may make everyone feel bad but the friend must respect that. You aren’t blowing them off, you are just in the middle of something you can’t finish later.
So, friendship to me is Love, acceptance, forgiveness, being supportive, being there for each other in both good and bad times, not walking away from each other when times get tough, caring, sharing, honesty, and loyalty.
I write this entry because recently I have had a falling out with a friend. I have known this person for about fifteen years and it hurts me that he’s acting the way he is. He has the right to do so but it hurts. The problem is that I was not in the wrong and he’s acting as if I am. He even went as far as to lie to a mutual friend of ours about things that got said and not wanting to own up to what he has done. It makes me look bad and I don’t understand after fifteen years why he’s acting this way. I don’t get it. You think you know someone and it turns out I don’t think I knew him as well as I thought I did.
I do miss him, He’s funny and a lot of fun most times. He is or was like a brother to me. I’d really like to talk things out but he’s deleted me from communications so I can’t do so. I don’t really know what to do here anymore and it hurts and kills me inside. I don’t think I have any more tears left for this. I hate when friendships end, especially the ones that have lasted for so long.
Sorry all, I’m not usually this grim. Mostly I’m a very positive and optimistic person.
Anyway, in other news.
Yesterday I met my new mobility instructor, she’s very nice and I think working with her is going to be great! She’s going to work with me on the buses here and also getting around the campus so I can start school. State Services for the blind won’t let me go to school until I can navigate the MSU campus on my own. I do get this I guess, they said that they can’t hire someone to walk me to and from classes. Really? I don’t want someone to walk me to and from classes, I’d like to be able to do this on my own. I was not expecting them to do such a thing, really…I’m not helpless. So, here’s to RuthAnne for teaching me how to get around up there, that campus is ginormous! I will learn it too because I’m determined to do so.
I haven’t yet heard anything from The Courtyard Marriott. They did say by end of the week so hopefully today I will hear from them. Here’s hoping i have found a job.
Well, I’m off to find breakfast and coffee, I can’t believe I have worked on this with no coffee, there’s too much blood in my coffee stream. I must fix this. I’m wishing you all a rainbow glittery bubble gum cotton candy no hassle kind of day! Do something special for yourselves, it’s Friday!!! <3 <3 <3.
Lily