Hi readers.
I’m currently just sitting here going through some of the music on my computer and drinking tea to keep off the chills of being sick. Ever notice how certain types of music or spacific songs bring you back to the past? That’s what I’m dealing with now. Listening to songs from 2000/2001 bring back memories of people i used to be friends with and miss deeply.
First there’s Eddie. Eddie was an interesting character. He had a great sense of humor and was always kind. There were times we had our arguements but we always seemed to make up and be ok again. Ride With Me by Nellie, (I think that’s how it’s spelled) makes me think of him because that was one of his favorite songs at the time.
Then there was Kari. i say was because bless her soul is now gone. She passed away in 2002 I believe. She had her quirks just like we all do and there were times I thought I’d kick her arse but she was there for me for the most part. She was sweet most times. She and Eddie became a couple and I totally gave her shite because she was married to a really good man and had children with him. Blind INC had a way of making you come together even if you knew you weren’t supposed to. Sorry if i’ve offended people by saying that but that place and I always butted heads. Of course if it weren’t for that place, i’d have never met Jim.
Then there was Brad and Will. I don’t know what to say about them, we had our run-ins but again two pretty cool guys.
There were times I was annoyed with all of them and wished I could leave them all behind but once everyone was gone and we had all graduated and went our separate ways, I never saw them again. Sometimes i’m glad for it but there are times like tonight listening to songs and thinking of them makes me sort of sad that that part of my life is over. No matter how much we faught, we were all still in the same boat and felt we had to stick together. If I could sum that part of my life up in one word it would be the word interesting. I sometimes wonder where they are all now, like i said Kari’s passed away but as for Gina, Brad, Will, Eddie, Ahmed, and the others I was with at the time, I just don’t know and I wish I did.
Last but not least, Jim. My dear sweet Jim who left this world in 2004. I think of him all the time. Not a day goes by that I don’t think of him and wish he were still here. I miss and love him still and always will. Jim will always have a place in my heart. That will never change. Jim was my longest relationship ever. I must have done something right for him to stay as long as he did. Oh don’t get me wrong, he and I went round and round too. We had a brief break up but we worked it all out and got married. I smile every time I think of that. I’ll see him again some day, I know I will and it will be a sweet reunion. How the bloody hell he stuck with me as long as he did I’ll never know. Flint says it’s because he loved me and that’s enough for me.
So much has changed since then. I know i’m not the same person I was back then. I know that change is good but sometimes it really just royally sucks.
*Sighs while she thinks*. I’m thinking that starting over would be a really good idea. Just go somewhere where life would be new. No, it wouldn’t be trying to escape my past but just to meet new people. Get away from here and begin again. I have the perfect opportunity and am seriously thinking of taking it. If I do, i’ll let you all know then what it is. Right now I’m just in the thinking stages of it.
Well I’ve had enough thinking of the past time so i’m off to do other things. I hope I’m feeling ok tomorrow, i’ve got soooo much to do around here.
I’d just like to say to all my friends, i love you all and charish each of you. Don’t ever change, you’re all great to me.
<3<3<3always<3<3<3
Lily